Violence Against Women and Girls PSA's Air During MN Sports

A big thanks to Chuck Derry at Gender Violence Institute for the notification.

Anoka County Domestic Violence Council/CBIM in Anoka County has partnered with Fox Sports North, and other state partners, including MNMAN, to develop public service announcements to be played during Minnesota Wild, Timberwolves, and Gopher hockey games in January

Fox Sports North has also developed a Coaching Boys Into Men web page with excellent short video clips and blogs focused on Coaching Boys Into Men. http://www.foxsportsnorth.com/pages/north_supports/

Do your part and help support or gather new ideas to create a on-going dialogue about respect and fair play among kids and adults in your life and community. Use this as a tool, opportunity to reinforce messages of respect for women and girls


*Promo spots will be 1 - 2x during a game, equaling 30 placements for the month.

January 2011 Scheduled Dates (although subject to change)*

Gopher Hockey: Friday and Saturdays only

MN Timberwolves: Monday/Wednesday Games,(Tuesday/Thursday/Friday)*

MN Wild : Tuesday/Thursday, (Saturday/Sunday)*

*check website for specific days on each teams scheduled games

For information contact:

Chuck Derry- Gender Violence Institute
P:320-558-4510 or E:gvi@frontiernet.net

Men's Action Network
MN Men's Action Network
15510 Huber Avenue NW
Clearwater, MN 55320

Help Kiana Firouz Seek Asylum from Iran

The UK Home Office recently rejected the asylum appeal of lesbian filmmaker and actress Kiana Firouz—a move that could lead to her deportation to Iran, where she faces a minimum sentence of 100 lashes or even the death penalty for “unrepentant” homosexuality.

The UK ruling has put the life of the 27-year-old in serious danger. Firouz starred in the film Cul de Sac, which is loosely based on her life. In it, she portrays the struggle of lesbians under the Iranian regime. The movie, which premiered in London on May 20, could cause serious problems for Firouz in Iran, where homosexuality is illegal.

The UK Times Online reports that the Home Office, in defending the rejection of Firouz’s appeal, acknowledged the danger she would face as a lesbian in Iran but argued that Firouz could escape harm by being discreet about her homosexuality.

Given the public nature of Firouz’s activism, however, there is little chance that she could fly under the radar in her home country.

You can help Kiana Firouz fight this ruling by urging the Home Office to reverse its decision. Send a letter to the Home Secretary Theresa May in support of Firouz’s case for asylum, and help Kiana Firouz remain in the UK.

Links about Kiana Firouz's story and petition online

Sign the petition!
http://www.petitiononline.com/kianaf/petition.html

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/middle_east/article7131310.ece

Cul De Sac movie trailer
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2lbQiB3rkh4

You Can't Tell An Accident to Stop or Pause

You Can't Tell An Accident to Stop or Pause
By: Direct Wisdom

Alone yet free
only way to truly be
at least, that's what she was taught
re-calling lessons of :
don't be afraid to smile
keep your true joy inside
don't share your intentions, dreams, secrets
and even your laughter
learn how to hide
be seen, not heard, kill more bees w/honey, always keep your own money
don't start none won't be none but if you do, you know what to do

if you... if you... if you want to survive
if you... if you... if you want to survive

Silent yet deadly
gaze equaled personality
at least, that's what he thought
re-calling stories of:
everything but the kitchen sink, beaten into and out of sleep
building strength from childhood scars
living less, classic broken home, fridge resembles neighborhood bar
head of household yet only twelve stealing cookies, cakes, soda
afraid of momma but not of jail
learned to lie for safety and convenience
remembered the golden rule don't tell

if you... if you... if you want to survive
if you... if you... if you want to survive

They say opposites attract
polarization happens everyday
the magnetic pull of your destiny lies in wait
so there they are attached to tragedy succumb to false reality attracted to malady
but you can't tell a accident to just stop or pause

She programed to expect less but yearn for more
gratification of self never was covered, besides she learned they will love you when you let them lay inside.
so a pool of yeses, head nods are a birthright and a occasional whisper of at least he better then the last one

He has nothing begins to believe in and subscribe to it,just living for right now
self-love was not only foreign,unattainable but not tolerated besides he rather make it daily so clinic visits, buckets of I'm sorry and when I get out this time, become second nature of the tongue.

They say:
I saw it coming
why didn't she...why would he...
damn he should have...I bet she tried ….
you know y'all quick to do that..heard a unanimous you ain't never lied

everyone calms down starts to agree
recalling there own mishaps, close encounters
shaking their heads in disbelief
feeling lucky nonetheless
and who would've guess it turn this way
you heard them say: man just the other day
they cool then at it again
one stood quiet thinking
were was his so-called ...what happened to her so-called friends

then everyone forgets
shoulda woulda coulda's ain't never saved a life
today would be no different

They say opposites attract
polarization happens everyday
the magnetic pull of your destiny lies in wait
so there they are attached to tragedy succumb to false reality attracted to malady
but you can't tell a accident to just stop or pause
learned to lie for safety and convenience
keep your true joy inside
remembered the golden rule don't tell

if you... if you... if you want to survive
if you... if you... if you want to survive


* This poem touches on themes of gender, stereotypes, traditions, roles, domestic violence, self-esteem, men, women, childhood, abandonment, self-hatred, friendship, gossip, destiny, karma, hardships, containment, anger, survival, secrets, tolerance, history, relationships, silence, values, memory, displacement,unwarranted compromise and belief systems.

VICTORY TIME

October 18, 2009
　

Victory-noun,
a success or triumph over an enemy in battle or war.
the ultimate and decisive superiority in any battle or contest
a success or superior position achieved against any opponent, opposition, difficulty, etc.


Morning!

At some point you have to claim “IT” for yourself - I know you may be tired, preoccupied with life, don’t have time and the list may go on but repeat after me:

I know what I want,
I'll rewrite the rules
I know my value,
I’m(Insert:______________)’s precious Jewel”
(name of Renewal Source/Higher Power)

When I heard this song playing today, I was tempted to do the same thing I did two years ago which was to shout and say Yes, Thank You Karina, beautiful song indeed. You are more then welcome to say those words above every morning or just when necessary, I don’t mind.

Music can be a gateway to healing, I would leave this alone because that in itself is a statement but I want to explore with you further, so for Today only when you read this, at whatever time it comes across your eyes do me a favor, yes YOU take a moment by yourself, in your car, with friends then, PAUSE.

Okay, find that one song , you know the one, when you hear it compels you to move from the inside, the one that makes you want to rock, nod your head, fist pump, jump, the one thing that will make you scrunch up your face because it starts to feel good umph, it is about to catch you, permission granted..get ugly with it !

Are you ready ? Would you like to suggest or exchange ideas ? You can tell me, well while I’m waiting for you to share and get comfortable. I must admit this to you, I have several songs that fit this category, I will share my Victory Song first because we are in this together.

Are you with me ladies? Do I have your attention men?

Let’s practice with your choice… say it, hum, write it down or sing it . I love it! If you are like me you just may be belting it out WORK IT!

My song today is: “CAN’T BRING ME DOWN” by Karina P.(young lady is a powerhouse) feel free to utilize. Here are some words from the song:

“Trust me, I know they will try
But they won’t bring me down
I know what I’m made of inside
They can’t bring me down
It ain’t over until the last round
Will they bring me down? No!
If I stumble I won’t hit the ground
They can’t bring me down” - Lyrics from Can’t Bring Me Down by Karina

　

The song you pick for your moment will start to move you in the smallest of ways, feel the momentum, maybe even a slight smile on your face, ladies and gentleman at that point it should feel organic, familiar. What is that? Your core, a feeling, your inner-self ,that connection, that says YES…I am ready today.

Go ahead! You have my permission to Enjoy, Tap into it and ROCK OUT.

Remember, When you are unafraid and unashamed to LOVE yourself , you HELP to create a small opening where ___________(fill in the blank) can meet you right there as if to say Jamila,(put your name silly)

I recognize your power, I acknowledge you strength, your potential, your gifts...
I want in
I want a piece
I want you”

**Believe me, they “whoever” or “whatever” it will be, rightfully should want that newness.

Success is only truly measured from the inside, congratulations, the road to healing has never felt so good.

I appreciate, celebrate, applaud YOU because you, yes YOU all by yourself picked a great day to enrich yourself and start again.


Jamila

Ending The Silence in Egypt, Africa

Sexual Harassment in Egypt, Africa

While I was reading this article, reprinted below, I wanted to find more information,not just to support this story but to figure out why its "shadow" resembles the inner workings and connections to Sexual Violence and the many stereotypes, roles and perceptions that being a Woman or Man can carry. Is there any weight that this(Sexual Harassment)has potential to lead to more serious crime of Sexual Violence that Women,Girls and Men face here in the United States and Abroad?

Maybe after reading, it may help You grasp or understand the concept that Sexual Violence against Women is in fact a global issue that we are facing and by becoming aware you can now ask, How can I help? What can I, my family or even my friends do to bring awareness that women are being hurt, minorities are being hurt, that children are being hurt everyday by Sexual Violence?

What has helped me and what I continually have learned is when you start to question or ask questions, you eventually seek out and actually get answers and they in turn, will be in abundance. So get ready !( smile)


Egyptian Center for Women's Rights(check them out here http://ecwronline.org/ ) published a study, a number of developments have helped advance awareness and bring redress closer to the many women who experience sexual harassment.

According to “Clouds in Egypt’s Sky,” ECWR’s study, 83 per cent of Egyptian women and 98 per cent of foreign women report that they have been sexually harassed, and the most common sites of harassment are on the street and public transport. A large number of men – 62.4 per cent – admitted to being or having been perpetrators of sexual harassment.

The study highlighted the differences in perceptions about different facets of sexual harassment. Respondents fell into three categories: Egyptian women, foreign women and Egyptian men.

Foreign women identified the widest variety of forms of sexual harassment. While many Egyptian and foreign women said that women of all categories are subjected to sexual harassment, most men thought that young women are the main victims.

The study’s respondents were shown pictures of women in different modes of dress. Generally, foreign women agreed that the way a woman is dressed does not determine whether she will be sexually harassed. However many Egyptians – more men than women- identified a woman pictured wearing a short sleeved shirt and short skirt, and with her hair uncovered as most likely to be a victim of sexual harassment.

Only 2.4 per cent of Egyptian women and 7.5 per cent of foreign women subjected to sexual violence reported it to the police. Most did not report because they thought that no adequate action would be taken.

The study also found that sometimes police officers mock or harass women who report, and this is a further deterrent. Blaming the victim is common with most other forms of sexual violence all over the world, there is a tendency in Egypt to blame the victim and excuse the assailant. (Sound familiar?)

A number of women did not report the crime to the authorities because they feared that by doing so they may ruin their own reputations.Many women interviewed seemed to agree that the silence needs to be preserved.
(Again! You see common stereotypes, tradition and gender roles that run rampant in communities. Which help perpetuate the general attitude toward responding to violence which is DON'T. What's worse is this"attitude"is taught, becoming a learned behavior, like a passed down oral tradition from family to family, society to society playing the same tune that even we as women who are the most victimized yet held the most accountable for the crimes done against us help uphold the standard of "SILENCE IS BEST")

( Picture from rally 4/18/2009)

About 53.8 percent of men said that women were to blame for being sexually harassed. The reasons they gave were inappropriate dressing, enjoying the attention or initiating the harassment. Some Egyptian women agreed that women bring it upon themselves when for instance they wear tight clothing.

Attitudes towards sexual harassment are beginning to change. In February this year, a bill seeking the introduction of stiffer penalties for sexual offenders was introduced into Egypt’s parliament. The law will also compel police to intervene in cases of sexual harassment. Two widely publicised landmark cases have contributed significantly to the impetus to deal with sexual harassment. In one, a young woman who was groped on the street filed charges against the assailant, who was jailed for three years and fined the equivalent of USD 900. Another man was sentenced to one year in prison for his involvement in a mob attack on some women on a Cairo street. Apart from these two cases there have been a number of arrests of offenders.

Although the steps forward are promising, the study shows that there is a long way to go in changing attitudes that are held by women and men about sexual harassment.

ECWR recommends widespread education to expand the understanding of sexual violence to encompass not only rape, but all forms of verbal and physical violence. The organisation wants police to be trained to respond to sexual harassment and a special reporting centre to be established for victims of sexual harassment.

In 2006, a commercial(Check it out below) was produced to show how visitors are harassed and how it not only effects tourism but the Country,but I think it's truly the local resident women who loose out more everyday.

For more on this story and related articles:

http://observers.france24.com/en/content/20090414-fighting-sexual-harrassment-egypt-women-rights

http://globalvoicesonline.org/2008/07/29/an-egyptian-mans-views-on-sexual-harassment-in-egypt-2/

http://allafrica.com/stories/200905300005.html

http://www.imow.org/wpp/stories/viewStory?storyid=1228

Church Leader pleads guilty to sexual assault in Franklin County

Quick facts

• Police have said the acts did not occur on church property and are not connected to the church.



• Two men who held leadership positions in the same Vinton church entered pleas Tuesday in unrelated sex crime cases involving children.



• Stone initially had been indicted on 24 felony charges, but some of them were dropped as part of a plea agreement.



• Stone is scheduled to be sentenced June 29,Silverman's sentencing is scheduled for July 7.



• Stone turned himself in to police 11/08 after he stood before the congregation at Church admitting he was in fact a molester

As reported on Roanoke Times
http://www.roanoke.com/news/roanoke/wb/202789


Dean Harold Stone, a former deacon at Heritage Baptist Church, pleaded guilty in Franklin County Circuit Court to 12 sex crimes. He faces up to three life sentences in jail.



Daniel Silverman, the church's former assistant pastor, pleaded no contest in Roanoke County Circuit Court to one count of aggravated sexual battery of a child. He faces up to 20 years in prison.

Gender Stereotyping-Assessment (Repost)

Gender Stereotyping

We want to provide information, assessments, exercises and relevant news in our blogs that you can use as an individual, amongst your friends,family or even as a aid.


*The goal of this assessment is to measure stereotyping in the context of relationships and responsibility.



Directions: Choose the best response according to your beliefs.

CLICK BELOW to take our Gender Stereotyping Assessment
http://www.%20surveymonkey.%20com/s.%20aspx?sm=D_2bDUMogWNZQvp11RUMbkQQ_3d_3d

**Higher score will denote a more stereotypical attitude**


If you have questions, call in to our show (347)215-9292. Tune in to BlogTalkRadio Starting May 10, 2009
http://www.blogtalkradio/build2blend

As always, send your feedback, questions or suggestions to blog@buildtoblend.org

Attitudes towards women assessment Part 1 and 2(repost)

We want to provide information, assessments, exercises and relevant news in our blogs that you can use as an individual, amongst your friends,family or even as a aid.





Attitudes towards women assessment Part 1 and 2



** This scale helps measure gender stereotyping**







COPY,THEN PASTE LINK IN A NEW BROWSER IF UNAVAILABLE FROM YOUR PAGE





Directions:

Choose the best response according to your beliefs.

In order to have an accurate score, complete Parts 1 & 2 for sum total.

A high score will indicate a high level of gender stereotyping; a low score will indicate a low level of gender stereotypes





Part 1 of 2 attitudes towards women





http://www. surveymonkey. com/s. aspx?sm=ygir6NBxZrsLcPMwYkri_2fQ_3d_3d


Part 2 of 2 attitudes towards women

http://www. surveymonkey. com/s. aspx?sm=_2bCW8yLzxZGLbFNhvjllbhg_3d_3d




Point Value as assigned: Scale 1 to 4 points



1= Strongly Disagree 2= Disagree 3= Agree 4= Strongly Agree (Except questions 3,5, 7,9 & 12 where value is reverse)



Ex. Strongly Agree would now equal 1pt. instead of 4pts.





If you have questions, call in to our show (347)215-9292 or email us about this blog at
blog@buildtoblend.org


Tune in to BlogTalkRadio Coming this May 2009

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/build2blend


As always, send your feedback, questions or suggestions to build2blendgmail.com

Abuse of young women fuels the HIV epidemic in Jamaica - JamaicaObserver.com

Abuse of young women fuels the HIV epidemic in Jamaica - JamaicaObserver.com

Quick facts:

• Sex crimes alone account for 827 of the more than 5,000 major crimes reported between January and September 2008.





• Rape accounted for more than half (536) of the sex crimes reported between January and September 2008.





• 485 incidents of rape between January and September 2007.





• In Jamaica(as in other parts of the world) a significant number of women experience other forms of gender-based violence, such as physical violence and sexual coercion





• Government began implementing its third National Strategic Plan on HIV/AIDS/STIs from 2007 to 2011. The plan focuses on achieving universal access to prevention, treatment, care and support.

• Men and women between 20 and 39 years old account for 54%of reported AIDS cases in Jamaica.
  

It was stated and I believe it is true for most if not all Multi-ethnic Minorities that

"the primary contributors to the HIV epidemic in Jamaica are said to be socio-cultural, behavioural and economic factors that result in risky behaviours such as multiple sex partners, older men having sex with younger women, and early sexual engagement."- Jamaica Observer

What hinder progress ? What aids cultural acceptance of women being exposed to violence ? The writer expressed these themes listed,the question I would ask is if you agree or would you add to what is stated in the article?

unequal gender roles with women,often in subordinate and dependent relationships

dependence on a man for your economic well-being

Men are also at risk because of the idealised images of masculinity, which dictate that the man should have a lot of women, and can take risk without fear of the consequences.

Marriage has a certain meaning in this society."The woman is seen as belonging to the man. The man is seen as the master of the woman."

shackles, anyone?

Because of that, marriage is seen as this precious institution designed for people to have children - they [women] are not capable of negotiating safe sex even when they suspect the man is playing around. The tragedy is that husbands cheat with women and with men as well."

when I was reading I wasn't discouraged just disappointed but oftentimes like in my personal life I can be encourage or give hope in the form of words, like this article gave to me.

"the culture that facilitates violence and abuse, and strips women of negotiating power, is changing.It is changing because people are more aware. The laws now say that those who are aware of abuse and do not report it are liable, so people are more likely to intervene on behalf of affected women and children. I have noticed a greater willingness to report and to intervene. We still have a long way to go but the increase in awareness has helped."

Man, doesn't that feel good, but I agree we have a long way to go not just in Minnesota but in the world when it come to violence against women and the readily accepted practices of keeping women in the position of less power.

READ THE ARTICLE - STAY INFORMED - SEEK HELP - SPEAK OUT

WELCOME TO OUR BLOG

We here at BUILD to BLEND want to give you information about issues surrounding Sexual Assault from many positions for instance; we will report on things going on in the community, around the state of Minnesota, news from around the US and abroad. We will also give you B2B's standpoint and survivor(s) point of view.






I personally think it's more important that we try to give you steps or ideas on how you the individual, your community can be a support to someone affected by the abuse and or assault. Our ultimate goal is for you to be equipped and ultimately ready and willing to help prevent Sexual Violence.

We think it is important for us to discuss in this format, social networks, in person for many reasons but I will share my personal view by giving you a couple reason that are important to me and why I step out continuously .

• there are women everywhere and with that potential for greatness and for exploitation of some kind due to Socio-Economic factors, cultural influence, Religious factors, outdated stereotypes and roles affixed on to women and young girls.
  





• We are not alone Sexual Violence and Sexual Abuse at the hands of someone else does not just happen in Minnesota, the U.S. but it's a epidemic that affects us Worldwide.
  





• Men are everywhere as well with the same potential for greatness but just like women run the risk of being exploited or having to live up to outdated stereotypes and roles because of Socio-Economic factors, Cultural influences, Religious Doctrine, outdated stereotypes and roles affixed to young boys.
  
  




• Minorities are unfortunately consistent, with the help of those same factors listed above over time to be an under-served community affected by Sexual Violence.
  





• All survivors are not shaped in a little neat box. We are all different shades and sizes, we don't all forgive, fight, cry, forget, move, heal, create or e even dream at the same time. We don't identify the same or even have the same issues before we were hurt, so why would that change.
  





• As a African-American Woman who has been abused and sexually assaulted I am pinch-able, living proof that it does happen to Minorities. I am unafraid to speak because for a long time I felt I couldn't...imagine that.
  





• People personally tell me and others what we do and say is necessary, someone is helped, you can make a difference, you are changing attitudes, you do make people talk about it (even if behind closed doors) they are still talking...now I say OPEN THE DOOR- so that we can come in and you let all that hurt, speculation, negative attitudes, apprehensions and pain out.
  
  

There is more, if you like, I can elaborate on those concepts or ideals stated above.

If anything, what I would like you to take from this particular blog or any that I or BUILD to BLEND may post is that sometimes violence does happen and often, more then any of us would like, those things are or can potentially be of a sexual nature.



Thank You,



Jamila and Everyone else here who supports BUILD to BLEND